Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

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What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Knock Knock ... Knock Knock The man proceeds to leave.

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What did the african get for his birthday? an ounce of water, as water is very scares in his community and it is a great resource

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

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What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

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What's worse than World War II? World War III.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? Because he was mentally handicaped

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The holocaust was one of the most terrible incidents in history there are very few things worse than.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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