Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

were did the gay guy go nowere because it was raining outside

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

I think everybody should have a penis.

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...