Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

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What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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Potassium? K.

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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A van drives into a car.

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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