Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

What's the point of going to college? There is none.

your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

hers a joke... japanese people

what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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