Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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