Whats green and smells like ass? My ass. I lied about the green..

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: She was going to speek at a PETA meeting about the cruel conditions of chicken farms. I hit her with my car

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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An over weight person is diagnosed with anorexia they used to be fatter

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Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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race-car = rac-ecar

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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Jesus Christ

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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What would happen if hitler and winston Churchill was in a bar? The police will be called to take them away as there just laying there dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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