ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

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How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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Why did the boy drop his lolypop Because it tasted bad

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

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why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

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Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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Men's rights

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

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Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops