A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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