Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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u know whats a crime? rape

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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