You're so sweet I have diabetes

Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

Whats the difference between males and females? fe

knock knock come in

What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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