Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q2: Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2: It was nailed to the first one. Q3: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3: Peer pressure.

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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