You know what's funny? You got AIDs

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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