Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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p

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

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A man goes in to a town on Friday, stays there for 3 days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? He's lying,

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A guy walks into a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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