How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

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13 =B you just learned something

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whats the difference between ebola and a can of dead babies? i have ebola. this isnt funny at all.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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Women.

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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