What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

You're so sweet I have diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black man in church? Religious

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the girl stop smoking? Because her mum asked her to.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? When they were tossing frisbee and accidentally tossed it into their neighbors yard and they had to go get it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black man? Rob

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops