your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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A 16 year old girl went into a bar. The police realized she did not have an ID, and arrested her.

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How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

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An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops