If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

WILLYS

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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