What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because goats lay eggs.

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What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

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What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

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So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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Why could a fat man not do a barrel roll? He has already to many rolls.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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