How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Jolly Rancher the particle beam is in the alpha quadrant and we are good to go.Please confirm receipt of this communique. Cell Leader Iqbal

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

What did the cow say to his family before he left the house? goodbye, because he was going to the slaughter house to get killed for meat

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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