Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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what's white and sticky semen

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Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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