Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

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What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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A house comes around the corner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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