Q: What did the racoon say to the cow? A: Nothing, because neither have the extansive intillect to speak in a manner that the other would understand.

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What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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what do you call a black woman pregnant with twins? A woman who has a loving husband who she wanted to have children with so when they had sex, 2 of his sperm fertilized the egg so now she gets to raise two children which she is looking forward to, but she also knows it will be alot of work.

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Why didn't he finish his

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didn't she get back on the swing? cause she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her up? Cause she had no friends. Why did she stay their all night? cause she had no family.

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A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

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Your Mamma So Fat The Old Thing That Block's Her From Destroying Kid's Party's Is The Front Door

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How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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What is the best Anti-Joke ever? Your Mom. :(

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops