my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

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Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

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How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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Knock Knock who's there? ... who's there?!?!?! ... WHO'S THERE ?!?!?!? ... stupid kids.

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What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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