What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

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What's the difference between a fat person and a whale? The quality of the fat. -Japan

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Equal rights!

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops