What is the difference?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes?

What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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