What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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Yo Mama just died.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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A man was shot. He died.

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What do we call Osama? Osama

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Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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