First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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What if I told you.....potatoe

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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