Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Iceland is actually green and Greenland is actually icy and Germany started the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a man makes a bad joke

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A Man, a chicken and a horse walk in to a bar and sit down at the stools near the jukebox. The jukebox is playing Love Me Tender. The Bartender notices the man pull something from his pocket and hand it to the chicken who takes it in her beak and then turns to the horse and passes it to him. "What'll it be?" says the Bartender. "methamphetamines", says the horse ironically.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you call justin bieber having sex baby baby baby oh

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

David: Hey Bill. Do you know what the most common place for a Democrat to work is? Bill: No. David: An insane Asylum, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a black person to work is? Bill: No. David: A prison, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a 20th centrury undercover German Jew to work is? Bill: No. David: A morge, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a Scientologist to work is? Bill: No. David: With Democrats. (Writen by Ben, avid Anti-Scienctologist)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops