A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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YOU

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an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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