Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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Sigh... I gotta go to night class studies okay?

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Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

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Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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