what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. There were 2 Mexicans in a car, who was driving it? A. The police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the black guy say to the white comedian? haha

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops