Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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