Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

thumb_up thumb_down -22

your mom was so fat that she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock! F*ck off

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How does a black guy die? Unknown

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

read this sentence again.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -22

your so homosexual you go to a gay bar every couple of weeks so you get the social acceptance you need.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops