800 people died last year. end of story

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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