what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

I have to tell yo people a story and you have to answer it. Q/S(Story):There once was a boy by the name of aids. He had aids because he had aids. He dad had aids, his mom had aids his whole family had aids. How did he die? A: He got hit by a bus you heartlest basterd.

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

POOP.....People Order Our Patties

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

why did the mexican cross the road? Becuase his other one was stolen by a Black.

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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