what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

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How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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knock, knock! who's there? i don't know i don't know who niether do i...

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An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

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You should read the Terms of Service.

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The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

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Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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