- Anti Joke

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

A man walked into a bar. I shot him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

your brother so fine that hes skinney

If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

DERP

Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

White men's rights

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike