How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

what's the best way to get your younger sibling to stop being annoying? Shoot Him

Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

a mexican guy, a jewish guy, and a priest jump off a plane they landed safely and had a great day

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

Jamie Oliver eats a chip

what is worse than a guy pissed?

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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