There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

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have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

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What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

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What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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