Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -34

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

thumb_up thumb_down -36

I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

dallen loves penis

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops