Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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Rush Limbaugh

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

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Yo momma so stupid she tried drowning a gold fish. She got accused for animal cruelty.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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Why do dead babies go to funerals? They don't.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

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If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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