Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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