A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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breasts

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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kkkk

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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A blind man walks into a library.

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What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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