Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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"What starts with an 'F' and ends with 'uck'?" "I don't know, what?" "'Firetruck.'"

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An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

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your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

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How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

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Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

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Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

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Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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