you dint have to be a jew matt

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Why can't you tell jokes in Base 8? Because 7, 10, 11

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What's black, white, and red all over? Many different things are black, white, and red; to list just one would be an unfair judgment of things containing these three colors.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

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Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

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Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Q-Why did the man fall out of the behemoth A- he had no legs

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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fridge

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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hey guys im gay

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I have cancer.

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Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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