There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

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What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

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A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

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whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

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Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

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There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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