How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

thumb_up thumb_down +5

MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

thumb_up thumb_down +5

69...you know how awkward this is now...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops