Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

What is a mexican's favorite sport? Soccer, it is the national sport of mexico

what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

He was as tall as a 6 foot 3 tree.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

How did Mary fall off the swing? She got hit by a fridge.

i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

So a guy is playing jeopardy and decides to choose the category "Therapist." so he tells the host, "I'll take the rapist for 200."

What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

What didn't the artist buy at Best Buy? A Ziploc Bag full of AIDs infested zebra pubes.

anti-joke.ru - russian style

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

Why did the elephant climb the tree? Because he didn't want to tie his shoe.

A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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