Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

What's worse than reading the same joke multiple times? Having cancer.

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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