Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

your brother so fine that hes skinney

Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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