Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Who wants water? I do.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

anti jokes are really funny

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops