So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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knock knock Goodbye

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

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A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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